This is the beginning of something new... and I'm excited about it...

The sun is out, welcoming early spring. It's the season to create, and grow.

Life has changed in the past 6 months.

A few things have died. Things that needed to, like depression and anxiety...

And new things have been born. Exercise and laughter every day.

Confidence comes again, new and more mature.

I am grateful.

On becoming a three year old...

The question is, after such a long sabbatical from writing, how to begin again... and I guess the answer is, I just do.

It's my baby boy's birthday tomorrow. He's gonna be 3. I think there is something really significant about 3. I feel like one year olds -are still babies... totally. 

Two year olds are still babies, with toddler moments, and three year olds... ah three year olds... They are defintely NOT babies, and they will TELL you that... with their WORDS that they have so many of. 

There is something magical about a three year old that once they've turned three, they seem to "take off" and all of a sudden you are left wondering where the time went- along with your baby. 

I realize Judah would totally resent me calling him my "baby", but I'm remembering, and holding on to the littleness of my son, at least for one more day... and Tomorrow with a lump in my throat, my eyes filling, and a happy full heart, he gets to grow up, but today... today he's still my baby.

Learning styles

Im tired today. Viva teething all last night kept me up for most of it, and then when it seemed we'd finally get some sleep (5 am) she bit down on me (with her two new razor teeth), I responded quickly (of course) with a "NO BITE"... two seconds later... ((chomp)) "NO BITE!!!" At this point I decide to switch sides and pray for a change in her tactic... then out come the teeth again. (This is where I make my mistake)... With the other two kids when they were teething they would bite me- usually only once- my first response to biting was a little flick on their mouth with a "no bite" order. It worked, really well. but for some reason I knew that I shouldn't flick Genevieve. I just knew it wouldn't be the same for her. So I had pre-determined WHEN she bit me (not if) I would be calm, set her down on the floor, say "no bite" and hopefully she'd get the message. Unfortunately, in the deliriousness of the moment last night I momentarily forgot my "plan" and when she set her little piranha jaws on me for the third time I reacted with the tried and true method I'd used with Nora and Judah... I flicked her little mouth (not hard mind you, just enough to surprise her) and oh, it surprised her, and seriously hurt her feelings. She cried like her heart was breaking. she cried for an hour and a half. I tried to get her to nurse again she'd try, tentatively- and break off wailing. I tried snuggling her, bouncing, rocking, you name it, she arched her little back and wailed. At the end of the hour and a half- she decided to try nursing again, and finally, finally with much trepidation managed to nurse and fell into a whimpering sleep. I felt like a terrible mom. I should have listened to my natural instincts on this one... then as I looked at my finally sleeping teether, she smiled. Not a little sleepy smile, but a grin, reminding me that she would be ok. I think the biggest lesson I learned was to listen to that sweet voice of the Holy Spirit, that often doubles as instinct. As well as the flicking may have worked for Nora and Judah, (not seeming to really even notice- other than not to bite me anymore) it definitely is not the tactic for Viva. It was a gentle reminder that each of my children are different PEOPLE, with different learning/love/communication styles, and the Lord will show me how to train each of their special selves. So now I'll go try to figure out how to keep my 2 year old from playing in the street, because obviously what worked with Nora is not working with him,  Lord give me wisdom.

I am... from Nora

I stole this idea from my friend and fellow blogger Alysun- and I think it's a great way to find out how my daughter is thinking, thanks Alysun!

I am... Nora

I want... to do the school game

I have... lipstick

I wish... that I had a present

I know... that I love momma

I fear... I can't tell anything

I hate... Satan

I hear... God speak to me

I crave... bread

I search... a leaf, a pinecone

I always... love Viva

I usually... do the things that God wants me to do

I am not... afraid

I miss... Daddy

I love... momma

I never... lie

I rarely... work in the kitchen with pizza and nachos

I cry... because my Judah pulled my hair, and so please stop doing that Judah

I should... do the things that God wants me to do

I am confused... of Satan, cause he gets me bad dreams

I worry... about Satan, that's all, cause he's bad

I dream... and God tells me good dreams

Follow me!

Just a reminder that you can "follow me" by adding yourself at the bottom rt. hand side of my page, it's nice to know who my reader's are!

bathroom boredom

i am bored in my bathroom. and in my opinion, 

no one should ever be bored while they are doing "business". 

so i've decided to paint it. what color should i do? any exciting, adventurous ideas?

 im ready for a change. a distraction from the blah.

Oh blog.

I like this blogging thing, with the exception of- I am so NOT computer savvy (hate that word) that everything takes me like 10 times longer than normal people. seriously. I have been trying for days (not literally- but it feels like) to figure out how to allow comments to show on the page with my blogs. I don't know if it's working- let me know if you know how. I can't change the background on my blog into one of those cutesy ones, actually I could probably could, but it would take me hours, hours I'd rather be writing. So if anyone has any shortcut blog ideas or a "blog class" they are teaching - I'd love to know about it!

Favorite things #4 Herbs and spices

Herbs and spice are some of the greatest sensory delights of my day so I thought I'd share my top five (since I can't just pick one)

1. Thyme: a happy herb, synonymous with savory. I have used it my whole life, grown lots of different varieties... but all of a sudden this love affair has begun, and I am seeing this flexible friend like it's the first time. Recently I have been using it with chicken, and ground beef, totally different, equally awesome!

2. Lavender: it has always been at the top of my list. My favorite little sturdy sweetheart, the joy of my garden (all 30 or so plants) the sweet reminder of summer in my winter underwear drawer, the delicate romance in my scones along with earl grey. Yes lavender, I will always love you.

3. Rosemary: my youngest daughter's middle name... Brisk yet approachable- I love to grab my bush as I walk past, the smell lingering on my hands, reminding of the kitchen, chicken dinners, sunshine. Faithfully green, easy to please, my little baby plant now bushy strong. 

I love it equally for it's flavor and smell, 

and the lore that strong willed women have the knack to grow it. I think it's true!

4. Nutmeg: Sassy and mellow, spicy and smooth. I love that I can use this spice in christmas cookies, spinach and meat! Nutmeg brings out the best in everyone, including myself.                        

5. Basil: Every kind-every variety. Fresh and alive. I love how this friendly herb is a bridge between cultures, and ethnic link to Italy and Thailand equally and most important to those kinds of food! I get giddy smelling a big bunch of basil- as the possibilities for kitchen greatness are endless!

What are your favorite herbs? How do you use them? I'd love to hear.

BTW: I got the pic's off the internet from food sites- Im not that great of a photographer :)

HOPE.

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness, I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus' name... On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand...

 

In this time of change I have to admit... I am hopeful. 

Hope is in the air.

But as much as sometimes I feel like it would be easier (because I can see with my eyes :) to trust in a man- (President Obama- bless him)

 I know that the only one I can really trust, and build my life on is Jesus. 

I will continue to pray for our president to lead our country righteously-

But I know that the only one who will make a difference is Jesus. 

I pray for President Obama to know him fully, everyday. 

I pray for him to  lead our country- with the help of the Father into righteousness, and peace.

But I know that a man can fail us. 

So that is not where my hope rests.

Tink

For a long time after watching the Tinkerbell cartoon Judah wanted to be called Tinkerbell, because "Tinkerbell FLYS!" .... until we watched the Peter-pan cartoon...

 Now it's... "I Peter-pan!" 

The other day I found "Peter" playing with this little doll of Nora's, I asked him what he was doing and he said... "I Peter pan! I take care of Tinker bell!"

And ever so sweetly he rocked his little "Tinkerbell" in his arms "Tinkerbell sleep- mama.."

"I luv-ah my Tinkerbell!"

Had to share this amazing little moment... cause it didn't last long.

Favorite things #3 Naps

Enough said.

Favorite things #2 Lollipops

Is there anything quite as wonderful as a child and a GIANT lollipop? I remember going to those candy shops at the beach as a child....

LONGING for one of those huge suckers....

So during this trip I gave into the urge...
I think I enjoyed it as much as they did!

A few of my favorite things #1 Quilting

I have to admit, I've been pretty discouraged in the blogging world recently. I wrote the most beautiful post about herbs- that I had been formating in my brain for about a week, in which I was about 2 minutes away from posting- and my computer shut down, I lost the entire thing. I thought about trying again, but the inspiration had been spent, it was no longer urging me to write... based out of that disappointment- it has taken me this long to have the "ummff" to try to write again. So here it is... I got this idea to blog about my favorite things, snidbits (yes it is a word- MY word :) of my life...So my favorite thing list begins... in no particular order.

Favorite thing #1 Quilting

I feel like quilts bring us closer to an era that time slows down
People talk face to face
Memories are treasured and heirlooms created
Warmth, security...knowing you are loved

Sleep

12 Am. and I am still up.

 The house quiet

The kids and Mark asleep

Although no one really seems to understand it, I need the time. 

I know it makes my mornings harder, and I probably should go to bed earlier, 

but my mind doesn't turn off until I've had some me time.

Is there anyone else out there like this? 

Restless sleep, yet totally exhausted.

Maybe I need to exercise, I've heard that helps with sleep.

And fat.

And depression.

Yes. Exercise. That's the answer.

Now to Do it.

I let you know if I do.

Snow-days

we've been snowed in now for what seems like eternity... technically I COULD leave the house... but with all the ice and coldness and crying fits- it spells disaster. plus I don't think our van would make it past the 2 ft. of snow in the road, that has been packed against our driveway from all the very big trucks with very big wheels going by our house. So I say "oh well" and just thank JESUS that our power is still on- unlike most of Dallas- according to how busy Mark said Starbucks was this morning. and so I will wait, trying my best not to lose it and shave anyone else's head.

Cabin Fever!

I've always heard cabin fever makes you do crazy things... Like decide to cut your two year old's hair, SURE we're trying to save a few bucks, SURE it's icy outside and I don't want to brave the ice with three kids just for a hair cut, SURE his hair is getting long and MULLETISH...I couldn't stand it another minute... SO I put Judah on the potty chair armed with chocolate chips and Daddy's beard clipper... (that would work, right?) took a deep breath and turned on the clippers, starting in the front- buzzed off the top of his hair, great! Judah with his mouth full of chocolate grins up at me, we're doing great. Soon I realized the clippers are slowing down, "Oh crap, I totally forgot about charging the battery before I started this process..." Judah starts screaming,  and I am trying to use every last second of battery power before my son is left with half of a buzzed head... the battery is dead, Judah is covered with tiny scratchy pieces of hair, and screaming, and he has a mullet, business on top party in the back, all the way. So as a recap- at this point there is hair all over the bathroom floor, all over Judah, all over me...I am frazzled at myself, and Judah is screaming and scratching at himself- I strip off all of his clothes and rinse him off in the bathtub, at this point he is hysterical- the bathwater is too cold, too hot, too something. so now the bathroom is covered in water AND hair. Gross. Cleaning it up at this point is the least of my worries, however- compared to the shrieks coming from the bathtub, "my neighbors will wonder"... my brain races. Finally snuggled  up in the dinosaur towel Judah has calmed down, the back half of his hair sticking out wildly and the top short and patchy, my son era 1982 looks up at me and smiles "momma, snugga da baby"-I say "oh your a baby"- "yah- I uh baby, snugga da baby".....so I snugga da baby, and it totally made my day, it was like the stress of the last hour disappeared and all that mattered was my 35 Lb. wet baby in a towel curled up in my arms. And yes, later we finished the hair- with a better set of clippers, no trauma involved! Pictures to come...

Placing blame

Today Im feeling grumpy, weepy, tired. Damn hormones. or something. It feels better to blame the unseen than the seen. Focusing on what really hurts, is too much to feel right now, and so-- because I know the unseen are realigning, I will just blame them. 

It's a bug's life Pt.1

We had a "bug" birthday party for Judah in July... I just found these pics and thought I'd post the cuteness...
Judah the birthday boy MR. ladybug...

Baby fly

The potato bug auntie and little butterfly

It's a bugs life pt.2

Mark the fly....

Spider cupcakes

Beautiful butterflies

Amazing